Okay, I’ve already admitted to & been sanctified as, having more than a wee touch of paranoia. In other words, I see Creepy People. I do. I see Creepy People all over, and Facebook seems to be, if not a breeding ground, certainly a conduit.
I don’t understand the Facebook friend collecting syndrome, this obsessive compulsive hoarding of friends. I’m not a celebrity, I don’t have the 2540 friends Chuck Palahniuk has (which is nothing compared to his page as a writer where he has over 37,000 fans – and that’s only one of his fan pages. All well deserved, so, if you haven’t read any of his stuff, do. Start with Lullaby. You’ll thank me. Really, you will). But I have FB friends who have friend lists that number in the low 4 digits & many friends with lists up in the 600s. I guess I’m a bit of a lowball loser, but I honestly don’t understand how I even have the 200+ I do have. I try to keep it to people who actually are, or at one time were, my friend, people I would gladly share a meal with, but this thing has a life of its own. Everyone I’ve ever met, spoken to, worked with however briefly or been related to at one time or another wants a hook up.
But if you don’t know me, and you have 4000 friends, why’re ya bothering me? Why would you want yet one more person’s inane status & posts clogging up your wall and home page? Do you collect all these friends & then “hide” their posts, claiming the digits without the clutter. It’s wierd, but it’s not creepy.
Therapy Guy says when I say Creepy, what I really mean is Sex.
Facebook creepy to me is the sideways friend flirt. This is Facebook, by definition “Facebook helps you connect and share with the people in your life”. The people IN my life, not the people who think they want to BE in my life. This isn’t computer dating. If that’s what you want go to Nerve or Match or LavaLife (How is that even still around? Who used that?). Or are people actually hooking up via Facebook & I’m just outta the loop, not in the groove? I’ve had a couple of unwanted flirtations – one from an old friend that really surprised me, but at least he was so straightforward it qualified more as a solicitation than a flirtation.
Today, it was that sideways creepy flirtation – men are good at this one, the kind you can’t quite pin down, with enough vagueoisity left for denial if called on the behavior. Annoying. Every time I logged on for the last two days, blam, an IM from my new “friend” with some inane how-de-do. Cute the 1st time, even the 2nd, by the 4th time, it’s just Creepy and I’m feeling I gotta go stealth. I blew him off and culled him from my list.
I love Facebook for the way it lets me stay in touch with the people I heart but don’t get to see in real life as much as I’d like. Friends out West or uptown, away at school, overseas or just those with busy, busy lives. I can pour through their information & updates at my pace, scan their photos, mobile uploads, laugh with them & make fun of them. It’s like an old-fashioned party line where I can hear all my friends & vice versa, without having to cram 200+ people into my small Queens apartment. Come to think of it, growing up on Long Island, my girlfriends & I used to meet teenage boys, total strangers, on a party line – then arrange to meet them in real life at the mall.
So is the Facebook “friend & flirt” just an outgrowth of that? Is my Creep meter working overtime? What’s your take on it?
