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| what’s the sound of two edies talking? |
Big Edie: It wasn’t such a good day.
Me: What can I do to make it a better day for you, Ma?
Big Edie: Shoot me? (Big Edie’s standard answer.)
Me: I don’t have a gun anymore.
Big Edie: You had a gun? What did you do with it?
Me: I sold it to my coke dealer.
(silence)
I bought it from my heroin dealer, sold it to my coke dealer, and gave two pockets full of hollow-point bullets to a dirty cop who moonlighted in the after-hours clubs.
Big Edie: A cop? You should have called the cops on him.
Me: That’s what you took from that story? I bought an illegal gun from a heroin dealer, sold it to a cocaine dealer, and you think I should have had the cop arrested?
Big Edie: Well, they’re not supposed to moonlight.
She’s got a point, there. You have to admit it.
Love it!