Tag: rape

These are the facts, so far: On Thursday, January 7,  a 39-year-old man and the…

I’ve been gone. I’m sorry. I’d tell you where I’ve been, if I knew. I’d like nothing more than to know where I’ve been and what I’ve done. I’d like to pull my brain out through my ear, pop it in the VCR, sit on the couch with you, a vodka and a bowl of popcorn and see what happened; see the things my brain is busy blocking out. Or maybe it’s the vodka that blocks it all out. There is no way of knowing.

It’s 3AM and the Lollipop is empty, except for a few regulars. Everyone’s feeling good and it’s like this morning never happened. Piper’s chain smoking Newports and laughing about something Chief’s saying; Myron’s in the back room with a new dancer, and me and Max are trading insults. It’s what passes for flirting between us and I’m so into this game, I don’t notice the Big Man’s come in until I hear the tap tap tapping of his diamond pinkie ring on the bar.

Still staring at my reflection, I gingerly press my fingertips against the burns on my chest. And just like that, that smell is back; the sulfur of match-heads, the slightly sweet hint of tobacco, burnt hair and flesh.